The big debate sweeping the nation is: To Twitter or not to Twitter? I have fallen into the ranks and have spent many an hour updating people on what I ate for lunch and my feelings about the current weather. Twitter is so hot that Spencer and Heidi were twittering from their wedding this past weekend (spoiler alert: it works out for them after all). Fortunately for us all, most of the gang from The Hills are twittering and allowing us access to their daily lives.

Heidi "tweets": Wow my dress is amazing! like a swan princess! and later, Praise Jesus!

Spencer, choosing not to comment on his wedding, tweets at Miley Cyrus, I just said a prayer for your puppy! Nothing is worse than a sick puppy!

Stephanie, meanwhile, tweets, Mmm i just had a sugar butter crepe... Totally healthy lol and Wow i just ran into a wall so hard- im trying to laugh about it-but ouch!!!

Our queen bee, Lauren, not one to be outdone, tweets, Ummm... did anyone else know that there's a "birthday cake" flavored jelly bean? Kind of amazing!

Brody tweet: THE BOYS ARE RAGING IN VEGAS!!!!! OMG!!

Enlightening, right? Don't all go clamoring at once to sign up. I want to believe that there is some evil genius behind these "characters" tweeting. Or at least, I have to believe that in order to maintain my faith in humanity.

See pictures of Lauren Conrad

Meanwhile, this week, the gals (Lauren, Lo , Audrina and Stephanie) decide to crash Brody and the boys' trip to Hawaii. Didn't Stephanie just get a new job? Do you really think Kelly Cutrone gave her the time off? Also, how did they know where the boys would be staying? Also, why do I bother to question the feasibility of this show week after week? And why does their hotel suite look suspiciously like Heidi and Spencer's apartment, only with different chairs?

Audrina's out to bag Brody, and the editors try to make it seem like Audrina and Brody are staring at each other throughout the evening. Although, in her defense, it's difficult to tell what Audrina is looking at sometimes. Brody and Audrina are looking at his phone, and someone yells, "Get a room!" Probably a producer off-screen. In case you were wondering, and you were, Doug "future Mr. Paris Hilton" Reinhardt is there, along with my new favorite secondary character, Sleazy T.

Audrina conveniently heads off to a spare bedroom to call Justin to tell him about her super fabulous fun trip, and conveniently Brody stops by to tell Audrina, oh so smoothly, that it's just one night, and if something happens, it happens. We cut to a commercial. When we get back, it's the next morning, the girls dish about where Audrina slept, and a fully-madeup Audrina comes out of her room and pulls the whole, "Gah, I am soooo tired ... pause pause ... please please please ask me why I'm tired" routine, and admits she stayed with Brody. Nicely played producers, we didn't actually see it happening. It gets worse (better?) at the guys' cabana, where Brody emerges from his bedroom, gives the victory arms up, saunters over to the hammock, and proclaims flatly, "I guess I cheated on my girlfriend." At least do another take where he pretends that it actually happened and that he cares.

Back in L.A., Heidi and Spencer are in a Barnes and Noble (wait, they can read?) looking at self-help books. Might I suggest Stop validating your existence by appearing in US Weekly and Learn to Live Like Real People? Heidi breaks the news that Colby, her ex-boyfriend, and his girlfriend are coming for a visit. Colby is currently at Bible College, and Spencer snarks, "Should I say a prayer or something?" Spencer, please leave the commentary to me.

Smiley Colby and his even smilier girlfriend meet them for dinner, and smiley girlfriend cannot stop telling Heidi that she looks soooo different from the old pictures she saw. It's called lots of plastic surgery, and the awkwardness is palatable. Spencer, in order to make things more awkward, starts asking about their virginity. And won't let it go. He and Colby go to the gym the next day and all he can talk about is Colby's virginity. Constantly. After their visit, Heidi tells Spencer she wanted him to see what a great guy is like "who is nice to women, and people." To the surprise of no one, Spencer has learned nothing from the experience.

Recommend (0)

|  Comments (0)

|  Email

|  Share

Share  Facebook Digg del.icio.us