What Do Top Chef and the Republican Party Have in Common?

Top Chef, it seems, is growing increasingly concerned with courting blue-collar audiences, which kind of makes it the Republican Party of reality shows these days. Compare it to John McCain, who, like the equally politically savvy Hillary Clinton, hawks a summer gas-tax break for the working man even though every expert in the country -- except his, I guess -- insist it would actually drive the country deeper into recession by costing the federal government some $3 billion a month and hundreds of thousands of jobs. Whether or not he actually believes in it, McCain has shown himself to be as desperate as Top Chef's producers are to increase ratings by making themselves look as accessible and everyman-friendly as possible. How else would you explain previous challenges that involved catering a suburban street party with items found in residents' cupboards and fridges or, more recently, catering a Chicago Bears tailgating party? It got even worse last night with host Padma Lakshmi pimping the virtues of Uncle Ben's microwavable rice -- it's cheap, healthy, and cooks in only 90 seconds! Cheftestants were charged with making a "fabulous entrée" in 15 minutes for the Quickfire Challenge, an effort to draw attention to how much time the average household has to prepare a family meal. Fifteen minutes? What can you cook in 15 minutes? Macaroni and cheese? Hell, my oven can't even get water to boil in 15 minutes.

Richard and Dale, who seem to be duking it out for judges' favorite, delivered chef Art Smith's best-liked dishes, along with Antonia who, after ending up in the Elimination Challenge's bottom three again last week, started the episode insisting she was going back to her roots. Paid off obviously. Next, to continue the We here at Top Chef value our blue-collar fans at home, even though they're probably already in bed at 10 p.m. themselves because they have to get up at the ass-crack of dawn theme, the Elimination Challenge called for the cheftestants to create a complete dinner that's simple and nutritious for a family of four, for only $10. $10? I can barely feed my girlfriend and me for $10 shopping at super-cheap Trader Joes, much less a family of four that actually requires something more nutritious than chicken-sausage ravioli and frozen fried eggplant that we eat, like, six nights a week. The cheftestants were sent to Whole Foods with the same $10, which, if you've ever been to Whole Foods, you know could buy you maybe half a pineapple.

With the help of children from Chef Smiths' charity Common Threads (which promotes family dinners), the cheftestants went to work accomplishing the impossible by whipping up dishes that were cheap, yeah -- but most people at home wouldn't be able to serve them to whiny little kids. Vegetable curry with cinnamon rice? Cous cous with edamame? Chicken paillard? My mother would laugh at such suggestions, then throw some Tuna Helper in a pan. In the end, Antonia also won the challenge, while persistent screw-ups Lisa, Stephanie, and Mark ended up in the bottom three, and Mark, despite how charming his Kiwi accent is, was asked to pack his knives. Like John McCain and Top Chef producers, the foreigner just didn't know how to appeal to the American working class.

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