It's a big world out there for news entertainment shows these days.

When I was growing up in the '80s there was one choice: Entertainment Tonight. Well, that and the two tabloid news shows, Hard Copy and A Current Affair. (I can still hear the sound that the triangle would make when it landed in the intro ... cha-chung!) These two programs sort of covered entertainment news, but mostly focused on sleazy, weird crime stories about serial killers, the mafia, and Hollywood.

A lot has happened in 20 years, and we are now a culture that is CELEBRITY GOSSIP obsessed.

I'm a college-educated, 32-year-old married woman with a job who generally always has a lot to do with her day. But leave the TV tuned to E! when I walk through the door and I'm held captive for hours. I abandon the laundry, forget to cook dinner, and suddenly am fascinated by Brit Brit's latest trip to Burger King ... I'm glued to excerpts from an interview with Tom Cruise in his Colorado mansion where he shows off Suri's "office," which is a little nook underneath the stairs (creepy!). I hang on through the commercial break to find out if Kim Kardashian is indeed zapping the cellulite off her ass.

To help you sort through the huge sea of entertainment news choices on TV, I present to you this guide of top five celebrity entertainment shows, just so you don't waste your time watching the really, really bad ones -- like Inside Edition.

1.) Entertainment Tonight
Network: CBS
Hosts: Mary Hart and Mark Steines
On Air: 27 years

ET is the timeless classic among entertainment "news" show. It's like the Eddie Bauer brand; even old people can enjoy it. Slated as a lead-in to CBS's nightly news lineup, I would suggest that old people are also watching it. The pace is not as fast as some of the "younger" shows (see numbers 3 through 5 below), which makes it a bit more relaxing to watch, and the news stories are a bit lighter, cuter and more innocent. Now in its 27th season, this is the oldest TV entertainment show of all time. Mary Hart, who has been a host since 1984, used to be like that sexy aunt you never had. But she miraculously never ages! So now she's starting to just feel like an older friend, except that she's not someone you'd ever befriend. 'Cause it would drive you crazy how perfectly she enunciates her words, though this is the winning characteristic of any good Hollywood reporter.

2.)The Insider
Network: CBS
Hosts: Lara Spencer and Pat O'Brien
On Air: Since 2004

This off-shoot of Entertainment Tonight cheeses it up to a hilarious degree. Every story is "Breaking News!" or "Exclusive!" Love the segment called "Rumor Report." Of course, every star is referred to as the hottest or the sexiest. You nearly get a seizure from the flashing graphics. Lara Spencer, the requisite blonde hostess, refers to her co-host, Pat O'Brien, the now-rehabbed recovering alcoholic with his celebrity drama, as P.O.B., like she's an original gangsta. Okay, so this show is nearly identical to Access and Extra! with its seizure-inducing graphics, synthesized background music, and ability to cover the same exact stories. But The Insider is like American cheese, whereas Access and Extra! are like the Swiss or Muenster equivalents -- just not quite as tasty.

3.) E! News
Network: E!
Hosts: Guiliana Rancic and Ryan Seacrest
On Air: Since 1991

How could E! not be the definitive go-to source for celebrity gossip? This is the network that developed the now ubiquitous E! True Hollywood Story and has aired one for nearly every famous person -- from A-list to D-List -- on the planet. (I mean, I've seen the Tracey Gold E! True Hollywood Story.) Celebrity gossip is the backbone of this network. E! News is a nightly show that has a way more modern, L.A.-inspired, sexy twist on the entertainment news genre than the fuddy-duddy prime time shows. Snappy, to the point, and always ready to let an irreverent joke fly, Guiliana and Ryan give us the scoop. The half-hour spin-off, The Daily 10, gets even more specific. E! News has the market on young Hollywood and never misses a beat on Britney, Nicole, Paris, and Lindsay. We actually have this network to blame partly for young Hollywood's self-obsessed ways ... but we keep watching.

4.)TMZ
Network: Fox
Hosts: Executive Producer Harvey Levin
On Air: Since Fall of 2007

Harvey Levin and his crew of collegiate Gonzo-journalist cronies live to get celebrities at their most embarrassing moments. This isn't so much a news program as it is a Candid Camera-style exploitation fest that makes fun of the whole celebrity-obsessed thing. With cameramen planted at airports, restaurants, and in parking lots, they capture stars when they least expect it and ask them embarrassing questions. As Film.com's Cole Haddon pointed out last fall after the show debuted the best part of TMZ TV is watching Levin and his gang in the newsroom, debating the merits of the lead stories of the day, and laughing their asses off at the ridiculousness of it all. Just yesterday, on TMZ TV I saw a clip of David Hasselhoff dancing to a Kraftwerk concert at Coachella Music Festival and asking where the VIP area was, and then a cut to Kim Kardashian saying "I love my big fat ass" in response to the claim that she's getting some work done.

5.) Chelsea Lately
Network: E!
Host: Chelsea Handler (not Lately)
On Air: Since July 2007

Okay, so Chelsea Lately is not a entertainment news show, per se. It's really more of a late-night talk show. I think of it as a cross between The View and TMZ. From her monologue to the panel discussion featuring other comedians to her interviews with notable celebrities (she was the first to interview Joe Francis out of jail), Chelsea covers all celebrity gossip that anyone cares about (okay, well, at least that I care about). Since it's a nightly show, it gets more of the headlines than say a Talk Soup or VH1's Best Week Ever, if that's your thing. It has its own niche: Chelsea Lately satisfies the comedy show and the celebrity gossip news need all at once.

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