American Idol, Judging Paula
FOX
It's down to just five contestants on American Idol, so you'd think that all the attention would be on the five incredibly talented contestants. But between scandals among the contestants, and strange behavior by the judges, the real entertainment this season hasn't been the singing. Case in point, when yet another bizarre outburst by Paula Abdul on Tuesday night left us all scratching our heads. In a nutshell, here's what happened. With just five singers left, Idol producers now have the opposite problem they suffered at the beginning of the year. Instead of having to cram 10 or 12 singers into an hour, they have an hour to fill with half as many. The answer? Have everyone sing twice. So now they're back to cramming ten singers into an hour again. (It's a vicious cycle I tell you!) Singing twice made things rushed. So rushed that the judges weren't allowed to critique the singers after their first performance. They had to wait until everyone had sung their second song before giving their usual witticisms and words of wisdom. But they were given a very brief chance to say something in between the first and second rounds, which led to Paula's strange and senseless episode. Ryan asked the judges to quickly tell how they thought everyone had done. Randy rattled off his assessments in short order. Then Paula began to critique Jason Castro for his first and second songs. Except he hadn't sung his second song yet. Simon and Randy had to stop her midstream and tell her that Jason hadn't actually sung the song she was talking about. Had she been drinking? Is she a ditz? Was she more stoned than Jason? All of the above? Frankly, I wouldn't be surprised if it was an act, although it looked pretty real to me. Either way, it completely distracted from the performances. The rest of the evening, I was just waiting to hear what stupid thing Paula might say next. At this point, I'm not sure what to think. I'm tired of the whole what's-wacky-Paula-gonna-do-next? shtick. But I guess it's part of the show. The judges' antics are just as big a reason why we watch as the contestants. Honestly, don't you sit at home waiting for Simon to rip a contestant to shreds? Aren't you secretly counting the number of times Randy tells someone they were "a little pitchy, dawg"? So I guess Paula's inane behavior is part and parcel of the production. As for the singers, this week they were mentored by Neil Diamond. When I think of Neil Diamond, I think of two things: karaoke and the movie Saving Silverman. If you haven't seen Jack Black and Steve Zahn singing "Cherry Cherry," that alone might be worth the rental. I'm certain it's a tribute to Neil that his songs are among the most performed karaoke gems. Go to any karaoke dive bar on a Saturday night and you're sure to hear "Love on the Rocks," "Coming to America," or "Forever in Blue Jeans" at least a couple of times during the evening. So it surprises me a little that Idol producers would thrust this on the contestants, knowing that one of the worst criticisms that the judges (especially Simon) can offer is that something sounds "karaoke." Then again, I suppose that's part of the challenge of performing a Neil Diamond song -- to make something original out of a tune that every in-their-wildest-dreams-wannabe-crooner has sung on a lonely Friday night or two. Frankly, only one of the final five Idol-ites did that consistently. The rest of the group fell right into the trap of performing Neil Diamond just like ... well ... Neil Diamond. So how'd everyone do? Here's my take. BEST OF THE NIGHT: David Cook: MIDDLE OF THE BUNCH: David Archuleta: Syesha Mercado: Brooke White: WORST OF THE LOT: Jason Castro: Wednesday night, it'll be down to four. Unless they decide to elimate Paula. Ethan Morris: "Not always right, but never in doubt." Go ahead and write me. Comments
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