Ah, Veronica and Logan. Will you two crazy kids ever get together enough to have some semblance of a normal relationship?

Answer: Not anytime soon, unless they want to become another so cute they’re boring TV couple. I love these two starcrossed lovers together but when they’re blissfully happy in one another’s company, something just doesn’t feel right.

The latest issue between the divine Ms. Mars and Logan? His “we were on a break” encounter with the loathsome Madison Sinclair, whom you might remember has played a pretty crucial role in the lives of our favorite kids from Neptune. Let’s see, she roofied Veronica on the night of her party (leading to her rape by Cassidy and her first time with Duncan), wrote SLUT in lipstick on Veronica’s windshield (which she discovered whilst staggering home), and is the actual daughter of Mac’s parents (the two were switched at birth, meaning that the new Mercedes with the Gotzmine license plate should be our beloved Mac’s). She’s also one of Dick’s playmates … reason enough to shudder. (Was it just me or did Dick actually show some semblance of a human heart regarding Madison and Logan’s, er, apres-ski chalet session?)

I loved the opening of last night’s episode of Veronica Mars (“There’s Got to Be a Morning After Pill”), which brought us a beautiful dream sequence in which Veronica woke up snuggled with Logan, put on a shirt, and walked out to the balcony, which became a snow-covered terrace overlooking Aspen, and then led to Veronica “catching” Logan and Madison in flagrante delicto, an image she can’t seem to shake from her mind. Torturing yourself much, V?

While Veronica blows off Logan and their date (confronting the guy while he’s getting dressed to go out for an expensive evening), she’s stuck investigating whether someone slipped Bonnie Capistrano RU-486, causing her to miscarry. The prime suspects? TA Tim Foyle (who keeps popping up time and again) and Dick Casablancas. Had Ryan Hansen not been a featured series regular, I would have put my money squarely on the blond bohunk, but there’s no way Rob Thomas & Co. are going to make Dick THAT evil.

But in investigating Tim, Veronica learns that he’s doing an investigation of his own, namely into the murder of Dean Cyrus O’Dell. While there’s no mention of the fact that Veronica’s perfect murder paper provided the basis for the crime, Tim has been logging suspects and witnesses, including drunkie Anthony Martin, who heard a gunshot around 2:20 am (he timed the noise thanks to a convenient episode of Space Ghost) in a nice bit of continuity.

Keith meanwhile has gotten pulled tighter into the orbit of O’Dell’s widow Mindy, who’s clearly concealing something. She claims that Cyrus had the minivan the day of his death and she was driving the Volvo, but Nish says that she egged the Volvo. It’s all a matter of choosing the lesser of the two (possible) evils, but Keith snoops around Mindy’s garage and discovers some eggshell concealed beneath the windshield wipers on the Volvo … putting Mrs. O’Dell firmly at the scene of the crime.

New suspects as well: there’s Mindy’s no-good, meth-head ex-husband Steve and Cyrus’ troubled teen son Jason, whom he was going to send away to a teen rehabilitation center … before his untimely death, that is. Could either of them have killed O’Dell? Steve’s after money (he even steals a vase from the O’Dell’s house after breaking in AND getting caught by Keith) to fuel his meth addiction, and the Corvette Mindy and Cyrus gave him (after forcing him to sign that settlement and stealing his bone marrow) has been repossessed. Jason, on the other hand, seems angry and hostile. Could he have followed Mindy to the Neptune Grand, taken the car while she was with Professor Landry upstairs, killed his dad, washed the car, and returned it to the parking lot with Mindy unaware that it had been missing at all? Hmmm.

Guest stars galore as usual on Veronica Mars. This week, Eddie Nettles, the creepy pro-life stalker guy was played by Johnny Kastl, who plays creepy morgue resident Doug Murphy on Scrubs, while Mindy’s ex-hubby Steve Botando (last seen in “President Evil”) was played by ex-21 Jump Street star Richard Grieco. Bonnie’s nefarious roomie Phillise was played by Barbershop‘s Toni Trucks; she’ll next appear in the Hugh Grant/Drew Barrymore rom com Music and Lyrics. Whoever does the casting for this show should be given an award right now.

LOVED that Keith and Veronica posed as Carson Drew and his assistant Nancy (heh) … and that Eddie Nettles didn’t exactly catch the bookish reference. And bravo to writers John Enbom, Phil Klemmer, and Jonathan Moskin for granting Veronica the fitting nom de guerre of Hester (Prynne); very Scarlet Letter and highly appropriate for her investigation. (Have I mentioned how much I love this show?)

Very happy that Veronica didn’t go through with Weevil crushing Madison’s new car into an itty-bitty cube. After last week’s extortion and blackmail scheme, I am glad that Veronica has seen the light and realized that while she can bend the law, it’s never a good idea to actually break it. Well, anymore than she already has, anyway.

I was heartbroken by Logan’s drunken voicemail to Veronica, especially as I knew she would delete the entire message as soon as she heard the “going through people’s trash” opening. Smooth move, Casanova. If you’re going to declare your love for your estranged girlfriend, you’d best not do it AFTER insulting her. Just a thought.

Still, after everything that happened, Veronica realizes that she can’t keep the need for revenge in her heart as it will eat away at her. That applies to her relationship with Logan as much as it does with Madison herself. Good on you, Veronica. There’s hope for you yet.

No Mac sighting again this week, though she does earn a shout-out as Veronica spies on Madison and her family giving her the Mercedes. (But, yay, Backup!) Weevil and Dick show up this week, meaning that Wallace’s disappearance from Veronica’s life continues and Piz and Parker are off doing something else altogether. Just as long as they’re not visiting Mac’s ailing aunt in Bakersfield, I’m cool with that.

Looks like there’s only a few more episodes before Veronica catches her murderer and the CW yanks the show for a few weeks to air (groan) The Pussycat Dolls Present: The Search for the Next Doll. Before then, I’m hoping that we’ll get to see a few familiar faces, but I am really going to miss these overarching mysteries that are being chucked out in favor of self-contained mysteries each episode.

But anything that will keep Veronica Mars on the air for the foreseeable future is okay with me, just as long as the quality doesn’t suffer. Hell, I’d even be happy with Veronica and Logan as that aforementioned happy couple if it means weekly mysteries in noir capital Neptune.

Next week on Veronica Mars (“Postgame Mortem”), Keith is hired by the widow of the murdered Hearst College basketball coach to investigate her late husband’s death and clear her son, who happens to be the prime suspect. Shades of Dean O’Dell’s death, anyone? Meanwhile, Veronica runs afoul of Sheriff Lamb and might just end up in the clink.

* * *

Jace is an LA-based television development and acquisitions junior exec who watches way too much television for his own good and would love a TiVo for every room in the house. (He’s halfway there.) His blog, Televisionary, can be found at televisionary.blogspot.com.