Really, can we get too much of those kooky Kardashians?

E! certainly doesn't think so. This August, Kourtney and Khloe Kardashian head to Miami, and they'll be taking the cameras along with them for the new series tentatively titled Kourtney and Khloe in Miami. The trouble-prone twosome open a new Dash boutique and let the hijinks begin.

And if that isn't enough for you, E! also announced the Lamas family reality show popping up this fall. Lorenzo Lamas, son of Hollywood legend Fernando Lamas, cashed in on his looks for a mediocre acting career. So the natural career progression for this 51-year-old guy is a reality series with his children, Shayne, Dakota and A.J.

Shayne's best known as the sexy aspiring actress who won, and dumped, British rich guy Matt Grant on The Bachelor: London Calling. Dakota's a teen who wants to conquer the music industry, and their brother A.J.'s claim to dubious fame is that he once dated Lindsay Lohan.

The press release says A.J. has dated the "who's who" of Hollywood women and starred on a soap, but his bio's pretty bare.

In other words, cable exploitation here we come.

What both the Kardashians and the Lamases have in common is minimal talent dressed up in a lavish lifestyle and a need to be in front of the camera. It's a familiar situation.

Here's a look at dysfunctional semi-famous families who turned their private lives into public fodder -- and we rank the rankest from the Osbournes to the Lohans.

10. Family Foreman, TVLand - The series, which only aired six episodes, featured the family of heavyweight boxer and grill master George Foreman. There was no sizzle. A boring series, but then what do you expect from a man who names six of his 10 children after himself?

9. Snoop Dogg's Father Hood, E! - Snoop claims this ain't the Huxtables, but some of the storylines seem pretty close, with him trying to sneak fried chicken past his health-conscience wife, called Boss Lady. Or losing a push-up contest with son Corde, nicknamed Spike. Lately, Snoop has even been giving father advice to Martha Stewart. Maybe it's just one former incarcerated pal bonding with another.

8. Meet the Barkers, MTV - Who let these dogs out? Former Miss USA and Playboy model Shanna Moakler marries tatted up Blink 182 drummer Travis Barker and together they spawn two kids and a reality series. The series was supposed to showcase their loving family, but the two divorced and the show was canceled after two seasons. Didn't anyone tell them about Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson?

7. House of Carters, E! - Just eight episodes, but the family came out swinging on every one. Backstreet Boy Nick Carter's family makes The Osbournes look like The Brady Bunch. This family kept the tabloids jumping for years. The parents had a contentious divorce, Nick had a DUI before all the other famous kids were doing it, and Aaron attempted a legal separation from his manager mother when he was just a teen. Good times.

6. Hogan Knows Best, VH1 - Apparently, Hulk didn't know squat, probably because he had his own dysfunctional side-circus going on. Ah, to go from Clearwater's Father of the Year to a dad having an affair with his daughter's friend and a son convicted of reckless driving that left his best friend permanently injured. But the family lives on in Brooke Knows Best, with Brooke coping with the general meltdown of her family. Because we all know the best place to deal with those things is on TV.

5. Newlyweds: Nick & Jessica, MTV - For a while, they were America's favorite celebrity couple, until it all came crashing down. But no matter what, we'll still have those fond memories of Jessica pondering whether she was eating chicken or tuna when she cracked that can of Chicken of the Sea. Or her theory about where buffalo wings really sprung.

4. The Osbournes, MTV - When the show aired, we realized that instead of the Prince of Darkness, Ozzy's the Crown Prince of Deafness. Whether the family was tossing hams over the fence at the neighbors or trying to justify their satanic decor, it was all just barrels of fun until the kids went into rehab. OK, it was sort of fun even after that. And they won an Emmy for the show. Honestly. A frakkin' Emmy.

3. Keeping up with the Kardashians, E! - Unless you're talking about Hugh Hefner, you would expect a dad, even a stepdad, not to encourage his daughter to drop her togs for a nude photo shoot, even if it was for a good cause. But in a recent episode, Bruce Jenner didn't mind that Khloe was stripping down for PETA's I'd Rather Go Naked campaign. No. Bruce felt his dad role required him to caution Khloe that she really needed to lose some weight before flashing the goods. No wonder Khloe wanted a DNA test to see if Kris was really her mom.

2. Living Lohan, E! - Lindsay's not even in the show, yet no opportunity was passed to mention her in every episode of this train wreck centering on mom Dina, sister Ali, and brother Cody. When Anderson Cooper commented on the series during his guest host time on Live with Regis and Kelly, he summed it up best when Kelly said the Lohan's were a "multitalented family." Anderson shot back, "Maybe that's in the episode I didn't see." We're right there with you.

1. Denise Richards: It's Complicated, E! - Why didn't we listen when Charlie Sheen begged us to boycott this show in which his spotlight-addicted ex exploits his children? And how bad can things be when Sheen is the voice of reason? It's not enough that Denise has a mouth dirtier than a public potty, or that we have to see dog vomit and poop littering the house. No. How about the episode when she discovers her 13-year-old nephew and his friends ogling her Playboy spread, which was probably planted by some sick producers. The embarrassed teen had to listen to Richards talk about how she bets she's the only aunt at his school who posed for Playboy. Yeah, that makes it so cool and not at all creepy.

Recommend (0)

|  Comments (0)

|  Email

|  Share

Share  Facebook Digg del.icio.us