When next we meet on Tuesday, our lives will have been completely transformed by the fact that the 2008 television season will be under way. Among the shows kicking off the excitement on Monday is Gossip Girl, the series with the highest hype/viewership ratio in the history of the medium. The first season didn't have much in the way of surprises, teen soaps being as formula-happy as any genre there is. But the New York setting was a small novelty, as was the choice to make Blair (Leighton Meester) an antagonist who wasn't completely irredeemable.

The second season begins (CW, Monday 8 PM) with our kids still ensconced in a Hamptons summer. Serena and Nate are pretending to be involved to throw gossipers off the scent, since Nate is actually keeping time with an older woman (Madchen Amick, an ingenue herself in her Twin Peaks days). Meanwhile, Blair returns to the scene with a new guy, and Jenny continues to weasel her way into various inner circles. It looks like another OMFG season for Gossip Girl, but I'm sure the CW hopes everyone who talks about the show decides to actually watch it this year.

Grizzly Man Diaries (Animal Planet, tonight 9 PM and 9:30 PM): They've turned the film shot by Grizzly Man subject Timothy Treadwell into an eight-episode series for Animal Planet, an idea which will no doubt strike some as questionable given that Treadwell was clearly not in his right mind and gave his life for his obsession.

Swingtown (CBS, tonight 10 PM): This show is developing a nice little cliffhanger as it moves toward what appears to be a permanent end: tonight, Roger admits to Susan that he has actual feelings for her. Roger, that isn't even necessary! She swings! You can get the milk for free! "Love" is so 1973!

Real Time With Bill Maher (HBO, tonight 11 PM): All rested up and full of venom for the fall campaign season, Maher returns with guests Craig Ferguson (newly eligible to vote!), journalist Michel Martin, and New Jersey governor Jon Corzine. With a reasonably attractive woman now running for vice president, expect some bad taste humor in that regard.

College Football: Alabama/Clemson or Michigan State/California (ABC, Saturday 8 PM): An idea so obvious it's amazing no one thought of it sooner was ABC's decision last year to turn over their Saturday nights to college football, which gets a small but reliable audience. This first week slate of games isn't spectacular, but things will pick up.

Jerry Lewis Labor Day Telethon (syndicated, begins 9 PM Sunday): C'mon, it's a tradition! You know you're going to watch! Even if Jerry is mostly making cameos in his own telethon at this point. Expect something like America's Got Talent, but with a tote board and no Jerry Springer.

Mad Men (AMC, Sunday 10 PM): Don and Duck attempt to smooth over their differences; Peggy senses she's being left out of key networking sessions and tries to nose her way in. Is this show slowly edging towards bringing Don and Peggy together? She certainly knows more of his secrets than almost anyone else.

Prison Break (Fox, Monday 8 PM): The ultimate "so bad it's good...no wait, actually it is pretty bad" series returns for a fourth season. It's been about six months since we saw Michael and several others tunnel out of their Panamanian prison, and the two-hour opener finds Lincoln trying to readjust to a calmer life, Bellick and T-Bag facing new opportunities, and Michael discovering that his attempt to avenge Sara might not be all that necessary.

One Tree Hill (CW, Monday 9 PM): Last season saw the old high schoolers aged a few years and having ascended to ridiculous heights of fame. I assume someone will become Pope during this sixth season. Tonight, we learn who Lucas pledged his love to, Nathan has problems along the comeback trail, and Brooke tries again to keep her mother out of her business.

The Closer (TNT, Monday 9 PM): Frances Sternhagen (who's been the imperious mom on more shows than I can count) and Barry Corbin guest star as Brenda's visiting parents, while Brenda works to solve the case of a murdered Hollywood hairstylist.

Raising the Bar (TNT, Monday 10 PM): Steven Bochco's biggest hit ever was L.A. Law 20 years ago, a series which has not aged well at all. He's back in the legal arena with this show about young New York lawyers on both the prosecution and defense ends of things. Bochco veteran Mark-Paul Gosselaar heads the usual ensemble.

The Middleman (ABC Family, Monday 10 PM): There's no guarantee this will not be the series finale for this show, which would be a disappointing loss if it happens. Producer Javier Grillo-Marxuach has promised a nice special effects blowout to wrap things up, with Wendy needing to find her way out of an alternate universe where stranger versions of the Middleman, Lacey, and Noser reside. I'm making it my mission to save this show! Who's with me?

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