The fall television season begins in earnest today: it's the first day all the major networks have new programming all night long. So it's fitting that the most popular show from last fall, Dancing With the Stars, makes its season debut tonight (ABC, 8 PM). I've given up trying to understand why watching people who were sort of famous at one time performing dances that were sort of popular at one time has been such a ratings winner, but as I've said before, I think the ugly duckling aspect is key to the appeal of DWtS. Dancing as well as the better performers does look hard, so there's a built-in story arc. And we can't forget Bruno Tonioli's joie de vivre, or whatever the Italian for joie de vivre is.

A new twist this season is that there will be two eliminations during the first week, with someone leaving tomorrow and another on Wednesday. Some quick pre-evaluations: 82 year-old Cloris Leachman will be way too big a fan favorite to go early. Sprinter Maurice Greene fills the traditional jock role, and is supported by two-time winner Cheryl Burke. Teenager Cody Linley has the Hannah Montana fanbase and another popular partner in Julianne Hough. Lance Bass did more dancing in N' Sync than singing, and his partner, ex-So You Think You Can Dance standout Lacey Schwimmer, will have fans of her own. One guy we know has no chance of winning: Ted McGinley, the man with his own Jump the Shark category. I just hope ABC wasn't overconfident in casting him.

Gossip Girl (CW, 8 PM): When Dan seems to be getting close to a new girl in school, Blair cooks up a plan to sabotage things by drawing the girl into her circle. Blair is extra busy this week, as she also puts her meddling nature to work concerning Catherine (Madchen Amick). Except for the possible sociopathy, Blair has a lot going for her.

The Big Bang Theory (CBS, 8 PM): The second season begins with the first date of Leonard and Penny, which doesn't proceed ideally (otherwise, you'd have a guy-girl show instead of a two-guys show). Also, Penny tells Sheldon a secret that he struggles with keeping.

How I Met Your Mother (CBS, 8:30 PM): So is Stella (Sarah Chalke) the mother or not? We might be a little farther towards answering that question following tonight's fourth season premiere. Also, Barney makes it unanimous by realizing he's in love with Robin. Seriously: Cobie Smulders, call me. I'm perfect for you--I've been to Canada!

Heroes (NBC, 9 PM): Following a one-hour recap/preview at 8, the third season gets off to a two-hour bang with the revelation of who shot Nathan. Also, Hiro adjusts to life as a company head and runs into a woman who has bad intent; Mohinder's investigations have a surprising payoff; and Sylar is back with a vengeance.

Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles (Fox, 8 PM): Cromartie kidnaps Charley's wife, forcing Sarah and Derek to consider a rescue mission; John is still hanging out with the weird Riley, which may bother Cameron just a little bit. I dunno John; if I were you, I'd be wary of girls who want to go back to your place without any apparent coaxing--ahem, not that I'd have any reason to believe this myself.

One Tree Hill (CW, 9 PM): Peyton gets a surprise visitor at the studio; Lucas tries to light a fire under his team; Haley looks into Dan's disappearance; Nathan is forced to deal with Deb's MILF status.

Prison Break (Fox, 9 PM): We saw Gretchen undergo a form of waterboarding last season, and she has another encounter with torture tonight. Of course, one might say any longtime viewer of this show is acquainted with torture. Also, Michael and Linc hunt for the next card, while Bellick and Sucre are tracking the inimitable T-Bag.

Two and a Half Men (CBS, 9 PM): The sixth season begins with Charlie (Charlie Sheen) running into an old girlfriend who happens to have a son that's a dead ringer for him. Well, we all know everyone in the Sheen/Estevez clan looks like they're related.

Worst Week (CBS, 9:30 PM): This new sitcom seems to have a thin premise, but early notices are fairly promising. A young man (Kyle Bornheimer) is both newly engaged and an expectant father, but can't seem to connect with his future in-laws. Kurtwood Smith plays the father of the bride, and he definitely has the angry parent thing down. Still, I wouldn't necessarily bet on this one improving on its pilot.

Boston Legal (ABC, 10 PM): The final season for Emmy's favorite drama (until last night--hey, it wasn't a total disaster) begins with Alan agreeing to help out the caustic Bethany Horovitz in a suit against a tobacco company, not knowing that an old girlfriend is opposing counsel. Also, Denny (William Shatner) has problems in the bedroom, and not the kind that involve leaky diapers.

CSI: Miami (CBS, 10 PM): It's the seventh season for this series, which is like 50 in Caruso years. The team throws itself into the investigation into the shooting of Horatio, and discovers leads that include Caine's own crew.

Dr. 90210 (E!, 10 PM): Diamond and spouse prepare for their first baby. Just a warning before you get knife-happy right out of the gate: the babies are supposed to be a little ugly at first. Also, Rey gets some baby news of his own.

Raising the Bar (TNT, 10 PM): Kessler puts herself forward for a possible political career; Richard's father offers Roz a job at his elite firm; Jerry defends a poor woman who is being squeezed regarding another case.

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