"The Spirit is an empty, empty film."

What do you get when you combine the cool visual style of Sin City and the slapstick goofiness of Looney Tunes? In a nutshell, you get The Spirit. It's the latest comic-book movie to play off the success of its predecessor, but it delivers nothing more than something cool to look at with an empty space where characters, dialogue, and story normally go.

The story is pretty thin, so I'll do my best to explain. The Spirit follows the crime fighter of the same name (Gabriel Macht) as he battles his arch-nemesis, the totally insane criminal mastermind known as The Octopus (Samuel L. Jackson), throughout the decrepit streets of Central City. In the midst of their everlasting war, The Spirit tries to figure out why his long lost love, Sand Saref (Eva Mendes), is in cahoots with The Octopus, unveiling a mystery that includes the blood of Hercules and Jason's (as in Jason and the Argonauts) Golden Fleece.

It's hard to pinpoint exactly what hurt this movie the most -- the over-the-top characters, the ridiculous language, the moments of slaphappy silliness, or the atrocious performances. In a way, I expected more from director Frank Miller, the man behind a gala of extraordinary graphic novels (and Sin City). The Spirit is no exception, as the visuals screamed Frank Miller from beginning to end. That said, what also screamed Frank Miller was this: The man can't direct a movie to save his life. The Spirit is a horrible mess, like his previous directorial effort, Robocop 3.

Any movie featuring a cast as talented and vivacious as this should have been a lot better, but alas ... it wasn't. Actually, I would go so far as say it was freakin' awful. Eva Mendes, Scarlett Johansson, and Samuel L. Jackson are all better than this, yet each one delivered sub-par performances. Maybe it was the silly sound bites (better in the trailer than in the actual film) or the missing character development that would have helped them along. Either way, The Spirit felt as though every scene used was the first take, whether it was the best one or not.

At this point, it's a toss-up between Miller's lack of direction, the actor's lack of effort (as they surely have talent), and the script's lack of smarts, story, or "what's the point?" moments that explain why The Spirit lacked any real ... well, spirit. Could it be that this visual style is tired at this point since Sin City? No ... actually, the film's style is the only thing that kept this sucker from being a total bore. The colors were rich (every black, white, and red hue was amazing), and each frame was a piece of cinematic art, straight out of a live graphic novel.

In visual effects, The Spirit scored an A+. The only problem is, in today's world of motion-picture special effects, it takes more than really cool visuals to make a movie good, especially when it's a visual style we've already seen before. Halfway through The Spirit, about the time the frame focused on the curves of yet another drop-dead gorgeous dame, I realized why this movie wasn't working for me: It's made for 12-year-old boys.

Don't get me wrong, I used to be a 12-year-old boy -- and that was a great time to be a movie fan, as pretty much every movie that featured special effects, T&A, action, violence, and overall coolness equaled a great motion picture experience. The problem is, I grew up. I started paying attention and my love for movies like this died forever. Bummer.

In a time where visual coolness is the status quo, the characters (yes, even in comic-book movies) have to be solid for a movie to be worth your time. The Sprit is nothing more than seeing what a Frank Miller comic book would look like on the big screen, with some misplaced moments of slapstick, an impressive cast of hotties, too many over-the-top performances, and a few boring action sequences thrown into the blender. The Spirit was an empty, empty film. Instead of wasting your time here, do yourself a favor and re-watch Sin City. Now there's a movie worth its weight in gold.

Grade: D

Ammon Gilbert delivers the latest in horror and comic fun every week for Film.com.

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