There are four provinces in Ireland that we know of. The fifth province is a land of magic and of possibility. Timmy is a shy guest-house keeper and an aspiring novelist who lives with is mother in a rainy part of the Irish midlands. His eccentric psychiatrist, Dr Drudy, is his only contact with the outside world and the person to whom he confides his infatuation with the president of Ireland--in this story, a bland looking woman. When a new motorway is constructed, it puts Timmy's guest house out of business. Mysteriously, a Spanish pilot named Marcel appears and creates havoc. Shortly thereafter, Timmy attends a writers conference where he meets and falls for Diana de Brie. Back at home, Marcel convinces Timmy to mentally "call" Diana, and, amazingly, she arrives at the isolated guest house, a circumstance that opens the way for a spoof of Hitchcock's "Psycho."