Jokers That Might Have Been

Crispin Glover in "What is It"
Rocky Schenck
Dre Rivas

There's been all sorts of The Dark Knight hoopla of late. Warner Bros. has kept us busy, teasing us with a couple of would-be looks at Heath Ledger's Joker in the upcoming sequel to Batman Begins. And since the Jason Bourne piece I did two weeks ago went over well, I thought I'd do something similar with everyone's favorite smiley-faced foe.

Below are five alternative picks for the role of The Joker. Laremy has been kind enough to recommend I not include Jack Nicholson or Clive Owen this time. No promises. Without any further ado, let's look at what could have been.

Clive Owen
Strengths: Hey, as far as I know, he was never in a Batman movie. That's as a good start as any.
Weaknesses: I'm sure I'll realize tomorrow morning he was.

Steve Buscemi
Strengths: He has the right kind of voice for the part, I think. There's two roles I think Buscemi was born to play. The first is Cobra Commander in a live-action G.I. Joe movie. "Retreeeeeat!" The second ... The Jokester (which only I get to call him because we're peeps).
Weaknesses: The infamous Buscemi choppers. Yeesh. If we have to be force-fed those teeth for two straight hours people might be checking out at the halfway mark.

Tim Roth
Strengths: He's played some great villains in the past and fewer actors have the gift for the mean streak like Roth does.
Weaknesses: He's already playing Abomination, the baddie in the new Incredible Hulk movie.

Jake Gyllenhaal
Strengths: He's a darn good actor and I'm pretty sure he'd relish the chance to torment his sister Maggie (who replaced Katie Holmes in the sequel). He also has the kind of Kool-Aid smile the role needs.
Weaknesses: Not sure what Nolan is planning on doing with the story but the last time the Joker was involved (in the 1989 Tim Burton film) he was making some pretty hard advances on Batman's girl. If they continued that trend here, well, let's just say that wouldn't work.

Crispin Glover
Strengths: When the rumors on who should play the Joker in The Dark Knight started flowing, this was the name that excited me most. The guy is seriously from another planet and that actually works for the role.
Weaknesses: Dude needs to work on his kick if he plans on doing any damage to the bat.

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Dre writes three times a week for Film.com, covering Movies and DVD with his Floridian flare. E-mail him!

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