When I was younger, 2012 was a world just three years shy of the one Robert Zemeckis and Steven Spielberg promised in Back to the Future Part II. As the years have progressed, I've given up on hover boards, flying cars and jackets that self-dry. I can accept it all if Zemeckis and Spielberg can accept that they are filthy, scuzzy liars who broke the hearts of children everywhere. Somebody should tell Biff that the sports almanac is likely bogus business.

One thing 2012 can promise, however, is a sequel to 2006's Cars. Admittedly, I found the original to be one of Pixar's lesser efforts in terms of character and story (visually, it was pretty stunning). But 2012 is a ways away. There's plenty of time to figure out how to make a superior film -- maybe even find a loophole in that Larry the Cable Guy contract while we're at it. Get'er done.

What else will we see in 2012? Well, I'm no sorcerer or prophet, but I can give it a whirl if you keep an open mind. Take a trip with your pal Dre towards the imaginary future ...

Seat-installed tasers
Imagine sitting in a movie theater. Some cretin in back of you is talking on a cell phone. The cell's LCD light burns through your seat. You ask him or her if they would mind taking the call outside. They roll their eyes, curse into their cell phone about what a bleep you are and give you the finger.

And you taser them.

The cell phone falls to the floor; you can hear the person on the other line saying, "Hello? Hello?" The soda they had in hand falls to the floor, too, flowing like the Colorado River -- the ice acting as giant rocks. You lift your shoes so as not to get them sticky. You've turned back around and now you smile, happy with yourself. A patron five seats down looks at you and gives you the thumbs up. You give it back. It's 2012.

Theater experience improves in other ways
Home theater setups have patrons asking why they even bother going to the movies, forcing the industry to go largely 3-D. IMAX screens grow in abundance. A small number of theater chains begin implementing Smell-O-Vision, vibrating seats and those tiny holes that shoot out air pockets at some Disney attractions. (In other news, the Mouse House finally and mercifully shuts down "It's a Small World," destroying ethnic stereotypes everywhere.)

Indiana Jones sequel is released
Ford is 65 now. In four years when the next Indy movie is released, he'll be 69, ten years older than Connery was when he appeared in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. And we'll still go see this movie.

Congress passes a law banning spoof films
Thanks to strong support from citizens over the age of 12, congress enacts Order 666. Writers, producers and directors of Not Another Teen Movie, Epic Movie and the like are jailed for six months and then treated as second-class citizens. Actors who appeared in the films get one year's probation. Any individual who appeared in these films as him or herself is immediately deported.

It's a dream but I dare to dream it.

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Dre writes three times a week for Film.com. Email him!

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