There was some talk to the effect that Neil Patrick Harris was not especially happy with the presence of Britney Spears on How I Met Your Mother, regarding it as the sort of stunt that becomes tiresome if a sitcom goes to that well too often (see: Will & Grace). He later relented, at least publicly, and Spears returns tonight as the series awaits its 2008-09 fate later this week.

Britney is back as the receptionist Abby, who is still mad at Ted and is now dating Barney, who has his own reasons to be irritated with his old friend. The pair decide to take turns taunting Ted in public, but Barney winds up going too far (imagine that). Spears got decent reviews for her first appearance, but it was really little more than an unexceptional guest role that was only worthy of mention due to surprise that she was able to look and speak like a sane person for half an hour. Eventually, the novelty will wear off and How I Met Your Mother will have to sink or swim on its reputation as one of the better sitcoms on television, which is not such a bad thing.

American Gladiators (NBC, 8 PM): Back and louder than ever. The male and female winners from the first season are Gladiators now and have been rechristened Jet (the former Monica) and Rocket (Evan).

Bones (Fox, 8 PM): Onetime American Idol contestant Ace Young plays an aspiring pop star who winds up dead by the side of the road, which will be a dream come true for a good many fans of Idol. As the investigation leads to an open mike night (during which Bones actually sings!), attention turns towards a deranged fan of the deceased.

Dancing With the Stars (ABC, 8 PM): Are all the performance shows going to be 90 minutes from now on? I suppose as long as the ratings justify it ... Marissa, Kristi, Jason, and Cristian battle for the right to make the finals.

Gossip Girl (CW, 8 PM): Serena responds badly to the revelation of her old secret, prompting rivals to pull together to help her; Rufus gets a big surprise while performing at a high-profile concert.

Greek (ABC Family, 8 PM): The girls are given the task of "coaching" different fraternities, which would have struck me as a really bad euphemism during my own college days.

Little People, Big World (TLC, 8 PM and 8:30 PM): A 8:00, Matt tries to teach his kids about tough but fair competition, while Jeremy prepares for the day he can drive his vintage pickup. At 8:30, Zach is flummoxed by girls. You're in good company, Zach.

The Big Bang Theory (CBS, 8 PM): Penny plans a party for Leonard when she discovers that he never celebrates his own birthday, but Sheldon may have other plans for the day.

Dirty Jobs (Discovery, 9 PM): Mike crawls through a house's innards in order to make it more energy efficient, and learns about inseminating turkeys. Please tell me that's not how Butterball got its name.

Flavor of Love 3 (VH1, 9 PM): A clip episode. Relive all your favorite moments of utter skankiness.

House (Fox, 9 PM): The two-part season finale opens with House and dozens of others being injured in a bus accident (House, on a bus?). As his memory slowly returns, he recalls that just before the accident, he noticed a passenger exhibiting ominous signs of illness, and tries to piece things together bit by agonizing bit.

Jon & Kate Plus 8 (TLC, 9 PM): Jon and Kate get dance lessons in preparation for the family talent show that Cara and Mady have put together.

One Tree Hill (CW, 9 PM): A piece of bad news prompts Lucas to come clean to Brooke; Haley has second thoughts about her musical ambitions; Brooke's baby needs surgery.

Paradise Hotel 2 (MNTV, 9 PM; Fox Reality 1 AM): The final three couples must vote someone out, but a twist shakes things up, as twists so often do.

Two and a Half Men (CBS, 9 PM): Charlie finds himself attracted to an older woman (Susan Blakely, good to see again), and what's even more surprising: she writes books!

Wildfire (ABC Family, 9 PM): No one seems very happy about Kris and Junior planning to marry; Ken puts roadblocks in the way of Dani's return to racing.

Samantha Who? (ABC, 9:30 PM): The first season ends with Samantha celebrating a birthday, and hoping that Todd will give her a present by breaking up with Chloe once and for all.

The Rules of Engagement (CBS, 9:30 PM): Jeff offers to help Adam's and Jennifer's chances of getting an apartment, but he ends up embarrassing himself in front of the co-op board's president.

CSI: Miami (CBS, 10 PM): A private eye (played by Tom Sizemore, who is usually on the other side of the law) carries a grudge against the CSI team and sets out to destroy it.

Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives (Food Network, 10 PM): Visits to a 90-year-old tea room in Memphis, a 1950s-themed place in Topeka, and a diner that was moved from Pennsylvania to Miami's South Beach, not unlike many actual Pennsylvanians.

Medium (NBC, 10 PM): The series didn't get going until January, but ends for the season tonight having reinvigorated itself. Allison deals with a couple's concern about an allegedly haunted house, the DA's race comes to a climax, and Joe learns why Meghan Doyle (Kelly Preston) got interested in his invention in the first place.

Real Sports with Bryant Gumbel (HBO, 10 PM): Profiles of Venus Williams and Danica Patrick; the post-career lives of thoroughbred horses; and the political ambitions of former NBA star Kevin Johnson.

Sex: The Revolution (VH1, 10 PM): A four-part series running at this time all week, which deals with how American society got all R-rated and stuff. We begin in the 1950s, when researcher Alfred Kinsey and publisher Hugh Hefner started the revolution, and the invention of the contraceptive pill made the whole process a bit less fraught.

The Bachelor: London Calling (ABC, 10 PM): Finalists Shayne and Chelsea actually will be calling on London in the season finale, as both women meet Matt's family. After receiving special gifts from both (quit snickering), Matt makes his big decision.

The Hills (MTV, 10 PM): The second half of Season Three ends with Audrina confronting Lauren over her sense that Lo is pushing her away. If this was real life and not reality TV, Audrina would just move on, but this show has become her career now too. If she's not Lauren's roommate, that means ... getting a job?

The Paper (MTV, 10:30 PM): Despite Amanda's nauseating good humor, the staff is not one big happy family, and the possibility exists of a revolt against the editor-in-chief.

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