Eric D. Snider,
Oct 24, 2007
Tired of 2007? I know I am. It's been a year of disappointing threequels, multiple downer movies about Iraq, and not one, but two, Tyler Perry films. I say we end 2007 early and start 2008 immediately.
And look what's in store for 2008: lots of stuff that should be fantastic! If I could travel through time -- and if I also had the power to make movies turn out as good as they look like they should be -- these are the 10 films of 2008 that I would see right now:
1.) Synecdoche, New York (TBA Spring)
Written and directed by Charlie Kaufman, the insane screenwriter of Adaptation, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, and Being John Malkovich, this is Kaufman's first time in the director's chair. I don't even care what it's about. Which is good, since the plot would probably be impossible to explain anyway (Editor's Note: Phil Hoffman is in it, so that's good right?).
2.) Indiana Jones and the Something of the Something Something (May 22)
Goofy title? Don't care. Heavy involvement by George Lucas, who has proven himself to be less than competent, creatively speaking, since the last Indy movie? Don't care. Casting a senior citizen as a whip-cracking, globetrotting archaeologist? Don't care. Hmm. The more I think about it, the more likely it is that this will be a train wreck. Here's hoping it isn't!
3.) Forgetting Sarah Marshall and Pineapple Express (May 30 & August 8)
After Knocked Up and Superbad in 2007, we get another one-two punch from Judd Apatow in 2008. He produced both of these films, and the writers and stars are his usual gang of merrymakers: Seth Rogen, Jonah Hill, Jason Segel, Paul Rudd, Kristen Wiig, James Franco, etc. I can hear the F-word already!
4.) Righteous Kill (TBA Summer)
Al Pacino and Robert De Niro share the screen for only the second time ever -- first time ever, if you don't count their all-too-brief moments in Heat. And who's in it with them? Martin Scorsese! I'd rather he were directing them, not co-starring, but hey, maybe Jon Avnet (Fried Green Tomatoes) is a great filmmaker. All I know is that Pacino and De Niro play NYPD detectives looking for a bad guy. Sold!
5.) Choke (TBA Summer)
Based on a great Chuck Palahniuk book about a reprobate who makes money by pretending to choke in restaurants. Some Good Samaritan always Heimlichs him and thereafter feels compelled to be his "guardian angel," sending him money, and so forth. Sam Rockwell and Anjelica Huston star; actor Clark Gregg (TV's "The New Adventures of Old Christine") makes his debut as writer and director. If it's half as cynical and whacked-out as the book, it will be a treat. It may also give me some pointers on how to pull my next scam.
6.) The Happening (June 13)
OK, M. Night Shyamalan. You disappointed me terribly with The Village and Lady in the Water. But people in the know say this screenplay -- about a family fleeing a natural disaster that could spell the end for humanity -- is your best yet. And I loved The Sixth Sense, Unbreakable, and Signs. Do not disappoint me again, Mr. Shyamalan. Don't make me angry. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry.
7.) The Incredible Hulk (June 13)
Speaking of which, when it comes to the Hulk, a lot of people didn't like him when he was Ang Lee. (See what I did there?) This reboot, with a new star (Edward Norton) and director (Louis Leterrier, of the Transporter movies), should give the fans more of what they want in a comic book movie, i.e., things being smashed.
8.) WALL-E (June 27)
Pixar has never made a bad film. In fact, Pixar has only made a couple films that were anything less than brilliant (Cars and A Bug's Life, in my estimation). Pixar is about as trustworthy a brand as there is in the film world. The latest story is about a robot who was left behind when all the humans fled earth, which, okay maybe doesn't sound completely hilarious. But unlike a certain filmmaker whose name rhymes with Shmem Shmight Shmyamalan, Pixar has never dropped the ball. I trust those nerdy little computer geniuses completely.
9.) The Dark Knight (July 18)
I've always been a little scared of Heath Ledger anyway -- I have a general fear of Australians -- but the pictures of him as the Joker are downright creepy. Christopher Nolan's realistic take on Batman revived the character in 2005, and the sequel promises to be just as good. In a way, it's beneficial that the Batman franchise has already been ruined once: Now filmmakers have a horrific example of what to avoid.
10.) The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (Nov. 26)
David Fincher (Fight Club, Seven, Panic Room) is one of the best directors currently working, and possibly also the most devious and twisted. This film is based on an F. Scott Fitzgerald story about a man who is born old and ages backwards. It stars Brad Pitt and Cate Blanchett, and I assume it ends with one or both of their heads arriving in a cardboard box.
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Eric D. Snider (website) is also looking forward to 2008 because it's a leap year. It's just a thing with him.
