Well, there's always some sort of a stunt involving the votes, isn't there? At least the "surprise transition" to the vote reading was better than the helicopter-motorcycle Amazing Journey of the Votes.

Ah, the trappings of the Survivor reunion show. Probst was all cleaned up and pretty, but still rugged enough to fit in with the cheesy themed soundstage set, with the band jamming, the people who got voted out in the first few days there hoping for 10 seconds of screen time... One of the things I like about the reunion show is seeing what these people look like when they have access to hair products and makeup. A lot of the time I think they looked better in the jungle. Amanda looked nice, but I'm not sure what Courtney was thinking with the Debbie Harry hair, or Todd with the Elvis sideburns. Is this because they think Amanda is going to win and they're jetting off to be in a Vegas show afterwards? A Vegas show starring former reality-show cast members as celebrity impersonators? Denise is trying her best to be fashionable in a dark-wash denim blazer, bless her little tater tot baking heart.

If Denise wasn't going to win (and I wasn't sure I wanted her to after the whiny act she pulled with Amanda on her last day there), I guess Todd is as good a person as any of the other three. He played a good game. Plus, it proves me right, as I'd been saying from pretty early on that I thought Todd would win.

Jeff played a clip to remind Jean-Robert that he had promised Todd he would make sure he wouldn't win if he backstabbed him. Oops. Jean-Robert admitted that Todd's statement that he voted him off because he was a big strategic threat tipped the scales. Um... this guy is a professional poker player and he didn't see right through that obvious ass kissing? Wow. Jeff called him out on that, too, and asked Todd if it was true. Todd admitted that it was ego stroking.

As soon as the topic of the individual Immunity Idols came up, James looked decidedly hangdog. He's really been an awfully good sport about the whole thing all along, though. Jeff asked the question we have all been wondering about, and he said he didn't play them because trusted his alliance.

Another strategic error was Denise's decision to stick with her alliance instead of going with Peih-Gee and Erik. She said she thought she would be at the low end either way, and had the best chance trying to win the final immunity and take Amanda with her. Peih-Gee said she thought she might have been able to get Denise on her side if she'd suggested taking Courtney out instead of Todd, and Denise confirmed that.

Okay, Courtney's turn. It's no secret that she was not my favorite Survivor player. I have to say that her attitude did seem to improve as the competition turned in her favor. Probst brought up the weight question: she started out at 93 pounds and ended up at 86. I've known enough naturally very thin people that I didn't really think she was anorexic. If she was, I doubt she would have passed the health screenings contestants have to go through. She asserted that her family is just small. I still think she could up her cheeseburger quota a little bit, though.

And now we're on to the "catch up with the other contestants" portion of the show:

Jean-Robert: Wouldn't have changed his strategy if he had it to do all over again and thinks he's gonna win a million dollars playing poker before too long. Also: seems to enjoy wearing silly hats in his civilian life.

James: He's gotten a nice response from the public for being such a popular player. He was a People magazine "Sexy Man of the Week." He gets recognized at funerals while he's working... which is kind of weird, but he says it makes people happy.

Denise: Aw, she lost her job and she's a janitor now. Could that suck any more? Piss! The school district says her celebrity is too distracting. I kind of want to hire her to be my personal lunch lady. Should a bunch of us chip in?

It was revealed Jaime and Erik are dating now, although her answer was kind of unintelligible and Jeff kind of had to beat a yes out of her. I couldn't really tell if she didn't want to say for sure or if she is just not very articulate. She didn't exactly come off as a think-tank candidate on the show. Erik is still a virgin, though. I can't believe they asked him that, but I guess if he was willing to say it in the first place it he should be willing to confirm it.

I can't believe that Jaime playing the fake immunity idol wasn't brought up. She deserves to be mocked endlessly for that one. Besides, it was one of the best Survivor moments in recent show history.

Dave: Got naked for strategic reasons. Apparently he thought his package would scare James.

Ashley: Is still doing well with her WWE career. Wrestling fans don't care that she was voted out early.

Aaron: Got screwed by the player-switch twist and is disappointed, but he's a good sport about it.

Leslie: Thinks her mouth is what got her voted off. Does she mean being a great big whiner? Why then, I agree. What is this "I'm not a religious person" business all about? Does that make sense to anybody else? If religion is so important to you that you won't respectfully participate in another religion's ceremony and you cry because you don't have a Bible available, you're religious!

Sherea: Surprised herself with how good she was at challenges, but then you can do that when all you do at camp is lie down. I can't believe she is proud of that strategy.

Frosti: Was disappointed that he didn't get to use more of his parkour skills and spent more of his time in the challenges getting beat on by James. Is trying to grow a porn-star mustache. Failing.

Chicken: Wanted to either go first or win. So... I guess it's nice that he got his second choice?

Okay, so there was another (corporation-sponsored) prize of $100,000 that voting had been open on since Thursday. I actually didn't catch this because I fast-forwarded through the commercials, or I might have called to vote for Denise. The three top vote getters were Denise, James, and Peih-Gee. The money went to James. That's nice - it doesn't really seem like Peih-Gee needs the money too much, but does James really deserve to be rewarded for not playing one of his idols? Denise could have used it. Apparently Mark Burnett thinks so, too, because he decided to give Denise $50,000. That's nice, but after taxes it's not gonna go all that far. Hopefully there's a non-Scroogy cafeteria out there that can use her and thinks her celebrity is an asset.

Ooh, next season will be long-time viewers (one of whom already has a nifty Christopher Atkins hairdo) vs. an all-star team. We'll be back to the standard old beach location, though, in Micronesia.

* * *

Amy Kane spends as much quality time with her television as possible, when she's not busy at her day job as a cube dweller.

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