Cole Haddon,
Nov 30, 2007
Hollywood loves music biopics, whether you’re talking Ritchie Valens in La Bamba, Johnny Cash in Walk the Line, or Bob Dylan in this week’s I’m Not There. However, I couldn’t help but wonder about those artists who have been strangely ignored by filmmakers over the years. Following that train of thought, I’ve put together a list of a few I think deserve their time in front of the camera, but would love to hear your thoughts on who else warrants a movie about their struggle for musical greatness.
The Ramones
The most successful commercially unsuccessful punk band ever!
They might never have sold the albums necessary to make them mega-stars, but the Ramones’ place in pop-culture, as the fathers of the modern punk band, will never be in doubt. And hey, I’m not the only one who wants to see this biopic happen. Vinnie Chase, star of Entourage, has been campaigning for it for a few years now.
Casting suggestions: Besides Vinnie Chase? I’d have to go with Adrien Brody as Joey Ramone, Joseph Gordon-Levitt as Dee Dee, and, hmm, maybe Colin Hanks as Johnny.
Hank Williams
Arguably the greatest country singer of all time.
Turbulent marriages: check. Alcohol and drug problem: check. Imploding career: check. Yep, the Hank Williams story has all the music biopic clichés, including a tragic overdose that ushered the country legend into the next world before his 30th birthday. The guy had a lot of low points, but my personal fave is when his own band quit because his drinking cost more than they’d get paid for a gig.
Casting suggestions: Ryan Gosling as Williams. The pretty boy is an unconventional choice, but make him lose twenty pounds and he could pull it off.
Janis Joplin
Hard-drinking rock legend who just wants you to take another piece of her heart.
Of all the music biopics suggested here, this one is actually happening – The Gospel According to Janis. I’m just glad Renee Zellweger – who, for the longest time, was attached to play Janis – is out and Zooey Deschanel is in (though Deschanel wouldn’t be my first choice, either).
Casting suggestions: Lauren Ambrose as Joplin.
Keith Moon
The Who’s antisocial, possibly psychotic drummer.
Hollywood has been trying to get this biopic off the ground for a few years now. I even had a chance to read a draft last year, which was probably one of the most incompetently written scripts I’d ever encountered (Moon actually walked through his own brain in it, trying to channel Charlie Kaufman, I guess). In other words, don’t hold your breath. Nevertheless, Moon’s alcohol-and drug-fueled life, filled with rock and roll debauchery the likes of which even Mötley Crüe would blush at, is the kind of stuff the music biopic was created for.
Casting suggestions: Christian Bale as Moon, all the way. Give Matthew Goode a dye job and perm and he could pull off a mean Roger Daltrey. I’d probably suggest some stunt casting with Peter Townshend – like coked-up loon Pete Doherty of Babyshambles.
Britney Spears
The, like, bestest pop star, like, ever.
Britney might seem an odd choice for a music biopic, if only because she’s still making news with her wild and crazy antics, but I’m thinking something more ambitious than the traditional narrative. Something experimental, like Todd Haynes’ Velvet Goldmine. It would be called Crazy, be about a Britney-like pop star, and somehow manage to explain the phenomenon that gave birth to her career and ultimately contributed to her psychotic break. Oh, and she’d spend half the movie barely clothed while claiming she’s a wholesome role model for kids and most definitely not, no matter how it might seem, marketing sex to sell her albums.
Casting suggestions: Hayden Panettiere as "Britney" and Zac Efron as "Justin."
