Poor April. She won't be able to make a fool of herself on national television again. The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson is on repeats for the week so no segment with him for April's last week in the house. April even got all dressed up in her finest hooker outfit for him and everything. But I think she was also thinking of America and how devastated we would be not to see her in her blue bikini again.

With her sparkly royal blue bikini top, teeny tiny blue jean shorts, and hooker heels she looked absolutely smashing. Smashing in the way that johns beat their whores up after giving them crack but before having their way with them. But please don't be too upset about not seeing April on Craig Ferguson this week. She's planning on wearing her hooker outfit for the live show tomorrow. Aren't you happy now? Perhaps Hustler will give her a call after the show because she definitely ain't Maxim material. But it's too bad she'll be wasting her outfit on Julie Chen and not Richard Gere on the Sunset Strip.

In other news, Ollie and Michelle have been valiantly trying to fight to secure April's hamster status but keep coming up short. I think it's finally starting to sink in with Ollie though that his sweetie pie will be leaving him soon. Who will he turn to for his two-minute booty calls then? I feel bad for the poor chap. Especially since April will probably drop his ass like a hot potato once she's done milking him (eww) for publicity after the season. Well hopefully one of Ollie's friends will pass on their recordings of his and April's "snuggling" for him to "use" down the road.

Oh lovely! Renny just offered April and Ollie the use of her HOH room tonight if they want to be alone. They turned her down at first but then reneged a little and said that they might take her up on it if they're followed around (meaning Jerry) tonight. I definitely just threw up a little in my mouth.

And finally, the hamsters are on lockdown until the show tomorrow night. Big competition or just overly complicated set? Might we be having a Fast Forward this season and this week's the week?

Ewwww. And now a closeup of April's Asian tramp stamp complete with butt crack? I guess I'll be tasting my dinner a second time tonight. Gotta run!

And check out this great video that BBAnne posted in the comments earlier today. Very cool to look behind the scenes of Big Brother. Thanks BBAnne!

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