These days everyone is ready to give Tom Cruise career advice (including yours truly). I initially thought Cruise just needed to appear in a few comedies to get his likeability factor up. But after seeing Tropic Thunder this past week and finding Katie Holmes's baby daddy to be the funniest thing in the movie, I've decided that maybe, just maybe I'm going about this all wrong.

Right now, Cruise is considered "radioactive." The feeling is that nobody wants to touch him, for fear of career or box-office cancer. There are questions about his box-office draw. But what if (stay with me here) -- what if Cruise stopped starring in movies? What if he became one of our great cameo actors? Perhaps even our greatest cameo actor? I think he's got the stuff to do it.

Let me be clear here. I'm not referring to supporting roles; not Paul Giamatti in Cinderella Man or Javier Bardem in No Country for Old Men, not even Gary Oldman in The Dark Knight. I'm saying zero top billing; no Cruise name on the poster (not even in the tiny credit print on the bottom). True cameo roles. I'm talking Ben "Buenos dias bitches!" Stiller in Anchorman. I'm talking N.P.H. in Harold and Kumar, Matt Damon in Eurotrip or "Blank," "Blank Jr." in The Incredible Hulk. These are silver screen moments that create legends. And Tom Cruise, hell, he could own them all. Hitchcock? Owned. Shyamalan? Owned. Bob Saget circa Half-Baked? Smoked!

I'm not just pulling this out of my bum. Cruise actually excels in small roles anyway. He got his best reviews in his turn as Frank T.J. Mackey in Magnolia (and he's got the Oscar nom to back it up). Geez Louise, his cameo (along with a few others) was one of the bright spots in the ultimately lackluster Austin Powers in Goldmember. Yes, Tropic Thunder isn't the first time Cruise delivered the funny in record time.

Of course, there is a flaw in my argument and that is that Cruise's role in Tropic Thunder isn't really a cameo. It's a glorified cameo if anything, really more of a real supporting role. Nobody said there weren't going to be bumps in the road though. When you go for something great and ambitious, it's bound to happen. We're going to just go ahead and gloss over that. I'm determined to see my vision come true. I want him to be the greatest cameo actor ever. Better than Scorsese, Samuel L. Jackson ... all of them. I want Cruise to grab Stan Lee by the shirt and smash through his eyeglasses with his fist. There is a new sheriff in cameo land, and his initials are T.C.

Tom, all I need now from you now is your 100% commitment. Isn't that how you always handle things? You go all out. That's what I love about you, cuz. You don't half-ass anything and that includes looking nuts. So look, you've done the movie star thing and you did it for a long time, especially in our "bring them up, bring them down and then kick them in their throat" culture. You should be congratulated and admired. But now it's time for you to branch out into new territory. Make a show of it, my boy! Imagine the places this can take us. Will you show up in a new Aronofsky film about a boxer? The next Judd Apatow comedy? No way you show up in that chick-flicky Meryl Streep movie, right? D'oh! You so did!

Always keeping us on our toes that Tom Cruise. What's coming out this weekend? Crap? Well, check this out. I might even start going to more movies now just to see if the Cruise Man shows up! I'm too titillated not too. He can be ANYWHERE. If I don't go see Bratz 2 opening weekend, I could miss the cameo of the year. That is NOT going to happen to me.

Let's not get overboard. All I'm saying is this: Tom Cruise could single-handedly save the film business. Hollywood should treasure this man, honor him. And they can do this by shutting the door in his face when it comes to lead roles. So no, Tom, you can't play John McClane in this Die Hard remake. But there is this role of Ellis we can discuss ...

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